Earlier I had mentioned I was attending a bible study on Wednesday mornings. I am enjoying the fellowship and the book. (Everybody is Normal Till You Get to Know Them) It has definitely given me much to think about and lots of questions about myself and how I make friends and acquaintances.
The most important question this book has made me ask myself is, "How do I appear to others?"
During college I was often told I looked angry or upset. I had a hard time believing this and thought maybe it was a new pick-up line so they could come up and talk to me. (most of these comments came from men I hardly knew) I was a cheerleader in college and I thought I was very outgoing and had lots of "friends". Looking back I had many people I saw on a daily basis, however they never really knew much about me and I no longer keep in contact with them. I wouldn't have trusted them with any of my ABNORMAL ways.
I look at pictures from college up to the present and notice I hardly ever smiled if I didn't know the camera was there. I asked George what he thought of my "approachability" and he confirmed I almost always look "pissed off" (as he so graciously put it).
So this book has made look at myself and how I look outwardly when I am around other people. Once I established I did not look happy I asked the question, "Why?"
I fear rejection and failure. I have since I was a child and if I don't put myself out there and I make it hard for people to get to know me then I will not be rejected. I need to change this because I long for conversation. I enjoy talking to other people. However, I fear they will look at me and my beliefs and think I am wrong, uneducated or naive. I am trying to find a way to overcome this and have taken little steps to open myself up to other people. It is unbelievably hard.
We are only on chapter 3 of this book and it already has changed my life. So far I would recommend it as it makes the reader look at community skills, interpersonal skills and accepting others and we know God accepts us (abnormalities and all).
My sincere thanks to all my friends who have broken through my walls and know some of my not so normal ways. What is normal anyway?
1 comment:
After reading this post, I absolutely have to read this book now. I think that because we move around every few years, building strong and enduring friendships becomes very difficult. Many times I find myself "friends" with someone only to find them leaving a few months later. To be open, honest, etc with someone we do not know well is difficult for anyone. I long for friends that I know I can keep for the long term, but sometimes I am not willing to put forth the effort when in the back of my mind I think "we won't be here for long" or "we will move again and never see this person again."
As for being angry/mad, I have never preceived you as being this way. The first night I met you (Christmas party at Drum's house), I was surprised to see we had so much in common. In fact, my first impression had you pegged as very self-confident, someone with clear goals, and someone with a strong sense of direction.
Very interesting post...it has me thinking. Will you be here for T'giving? Join us if you are in town with no plans.
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